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RATES & CONTACT
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MEET YOUR HORSTESS*
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Ilse is your hostess. She makes good food and looks after Ludwig when she is not trying to fatten you up for the Red Herring. She is no laughing matter. At least not at my instance - I carry more war wounds than any soldier ever did even those who were at Al Alamein. Ludwig is our son. He is almost two and will probably try and hit you with a hammer. Get your insurance in order - life policies (which I sell) are the order of the day. The horses' innocent appearance is misleading, to say the least. I have been attacked twice, once with a saddle. Terra nova became very firma.
There is a prize for whoever is brave enough to get onto any of the horses: one free night at the Graaff-Reinet Hospital. Conditions apply. Food is for your own pocket as well as expenses incurred for any additional days spent. The last person who wandered in there with a smile on his face, looking for his pet parrot, is still speechless; and they can't get the stitches out.
Ilse will give you food which I don't get. It is worth it, I am told. But, I don't care because this is the end of my contribution and I am gonna get seriously legless.
BUT BEFORE I DO PLEASE NOTICE THAT THERE ARE MAPS AVAILABLE - just click on the link you passed a second ago. I think the CAPS says it all. Also, bear in mind that we are on a LITTLE farm and are not always at the beck and call of cell phone reception. There is proper reception at the guest house but not everywhere else which is why you need a map.
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CONTACT
TELEPHONE
+27 (0)49 893 0313
CELLPHONE
+27 (0)83 925 37 46
FAX
+27 (0)49 893 0561
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RATES
Adults
B&B ZAR 360.00 p/p sharing
Children <12 years
sharing with parents
B&B ZAR 200.00
Single adults
Add ZAR 100.00 p/p
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OWN RISK
The guest house is on a small farm. There are animals, some domesticated and others not and others simply vile, like the baboon who may just visit on a vote winning ticket. There are ditches, stones and potholes. The odd iPod lies around - its owner and the red herring are off somewhere. There are fences, pumps and other stuff. In fact, there is a myriad of farm and domestic things that can hurt or maim, just like in your own home. There is a swimming pool. Although it is fenced one never knows. Also, there are poisons and other chemicals in the sheds. Whether you poke around, stay for one minute (like Frau Krautface from Switzerland) or stay for a few day it is at your own risk.
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Prickly pear, need I say more, the end.
See De Erf Tribune
(Only for the Brave)
Signing out.
De Erf Manor House, Graaff-Reinet
Accommodation for those in the know.
(although not any judging by what I have seen)
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*FOOTNOTE: This is probably the worst joke in the history of mankind, if not longer ago. But I thought, what the heck, I am too lazy to change it. Live with it. Have a T-shirt made.
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